18 Ways Narcissists Fuel Their Egos in Private Moments

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Narcissists tend to focus on themselves, often reinforcing their self-image, indulging in fantasies of power, or engaging in behaviors that align with their inflated sense of self-importance. Here’s a list of 18 behaviors and things narcissists might do when they’re alone and no one is watching. These actions often reflect their need for admiration, self-validation, and control, even in private moments. 

1. Talk to Themselves in the Mirror

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Narcissists often engage in self-admiration when they are alone. They might spend a lot of time talking to themselves in the mirror, praising their appearance, or rehearsing how they would impress others. This behavior reflects their need for constant validation and self-assurance.

2. Rehearse Conversations

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To maintain control and appear perfect in social situations, narcissists may rehearse conversations they plan to have. They practice their responses, plan their manipulations, or even anticipate conflicts where they come out as the superior party.

3. Fantasize About Power and Success

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Narcissists often indulge in grandiose fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, or ideal love. When alone, they may daydream about being admired, feared, or revered by others, reinforcing their inflated self-image.

4. Spy on Others

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In private, narcissists might spend time checking up on others—whether it’s snooping through social media, emails, or messages. They have a strong need to know what people are saying about them and often feel entitled to invade others’ privacy to satisfy this curiosity.

5. Admire Photos and Videos of Themselves

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Self-admiration is a key trait of narcissism. Narcissists might spend time scrolling through photos and videos of themselves, liking, commenting, or even editing them to enhance their appearance further. They analyze their performance, admire their behavior, and may even take notes on how to appear more charismatic or powerful. This helps them feel superior and admired, even if it's just by themselves.

6. Engage in Self-Praise and Monologues

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When alone, narcissists often talk to themselves, praising their intelligence, achievements, or looks. They may engage in long monologues where they imagine they are speaking to an audience that admires them, reaffirming their sense of superiority.

7. Relive Past Glories

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Narcissists often dwell on past events where they felt admired, successful, or dominant. They replay these memories to reinforce their grandiose self-image and remind themselves of their perceived superiority over others.

8. Plot and Scheme Against Others

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Narcissists are known for their manipulative tendencies. When alone, they may plan and scheme ways to manipulate or control others to maintain their power and dominance in relationships or social settings.

9. Practice Facial Expressions and Body Language

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To maintain a facade of confidence, charm, or intimidation, narcissists might practice their facial expressions and body language in front of a mirror. This helps them perfect their image and ensure they can manipulate others more effectively in social situations.

10. Feel Victimized and Self-Pity

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When alone, narcissists may indulge in feelings of victimization and self-pity. They view themselves as misunderstood or mistreated by others and use these thoughts to justify their manipulative behaviors or superiority complex.

11. Blame Others for Their Problems

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Even when alone, narcissists will often mentally blame others for any problems or failures in their lives. They rarely take responsibility and instead create scenarios where they are the victims of others’ shortcomings or wrongdoings.

12. Create Social Media Content for Validation

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In private, narcissists may spend hours curating their social media profiles, creating content that portrays them in the best possible light. This constant need for validation and admiration drives them to edit, filter, and perfect their online persona.

13. Talk to Imaginary Admirers

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A narcissist might imagine having conversations with admirers or people who praise them. They play out scenarios where they receive compliments or recognition, reinforcing their sense of superiority and desirability.

14. Obsessively Check Their Appearance

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Narcissists often have a heightened preoccupation with their looks. When alone, they might constantly check their appearance, adjust their hair, or fix their outfits to ensure they look perfect, even if no one is around to see them.

15. Research People They View as Competition

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Narcissists are often threatened by others who they perceive as competition. They may spend time researching these people, finding flaws to exploit or ways to undermine them. This helps them feel more secure in their superiority.

16. Engage in Self-Soothing Behaviors

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Despite their external confidence, narcissists often have deep insecurities. They might engage in self-soothing behaviors, such as talking themselves up or repeating affirmations that reinforce their perceived greatness.

17. Replay Conflicts and Think of Comebacks

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Narcissists may obsess over past conflicts or arguments, replaying them in their minds and thinking of better comebacks or ways they could have asserted dominance. This helps them feel in control, even in retrospect.

18. Google Themselves

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Narcissists are often obsessed with their public image. They might spend time Googling themselves, reading about their accomplishments, or seeing how others perceive them online. They crave validation and reassurance of their importance.

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